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Ah A Jeep Story For Christmas

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  • Ah A Jeep Story For Christmas

    Twas the night before Christmas, And all through the trails,

    Every JEEP was stranded, Their progress like snails.



    They had no shovels, No rope and no winch,

    No CB, no cell-phone, To get out of their pinch.



    When out from a mud pit, There arose such a clatter;

    All the wheels came a spinnin, To see what was the matter.



    I saw some poor ole' JEEP, All covered in crud;

    He had blown his motor trying to get free of the mud.



    As he stood there I noticed His glowing red face,

    And I knew in an instant, He wanted out of this place.



    I glanced at his roof, It was all I could see;

    He pleaded for help, From my winch and from me.



    So I sprang to the front Of my trusty old toy,

    Spooled out the winch cable, Said "Hook 'er up, boy!"



    He went for a swim In the watery hell, and

    I laughed as he turned brown, And started to smell.



    He hooked up the cable to his buried front hook,

    I put a coat on the line, Like it says in the book.



    I winched him out quickly, A very fast session;

    And I charged him a C-note, To teach him a lesson.



    I then drove my MONSTER FORD through the same mud and same muck;

    No problem for me, 'Cause I had a REAL truck!



    I rolled down my window as I drove out of sight,

    And smugly yelled "Next Time Stay Home Christmas Night!"

  • #2
    Boy o boy..... you better hope no jeepr who reads this comes to your aid one day.

    But great poem!!! Loved it.

    Bob
    "If you have significant difficulty here, dont go any further....it only gets worse".
    (Charles Wells)

    Comment


    • #3
      For your viewing pleasure:

      FORD #1: (small one)


      FORD #2: (full sized)

      If we aren't supposed to eat animals, then why are they made out of meat?

      http://jeep.matandtiff.com/

      Truth is treason in the empire of lies. -Ron Paul

      Comment


      • #4
        Show'd him..... way to go Mat!!!
        "If you have significant difficulty here, dont go any further....it only gets worse".
        (Charles Wells)

        Comment


        • #5
          Trucks are nice, but ford sucks....Chevy...heck yeah.
          WTF Mate?

          Confucious Say: He who stand on toilet...is high on pot.

          ______
          [_____]
          (HllllllllH) vroom VROOM
          []--o---[]

          Comment


          • #6
            'Twas the night before Christmas
            And all across the land,
            All the Jeepers were wheelin',
            But hey, it's a Jeep thing, so you totally understand!

            The rocks were a callin'
            So without hesitation
            I jumped in my Cherokee
            To get me some articulation!


            The 35's were aired down
            To 10 pounds of pressure
            And the CO2 bottle filled
            Just for good measure!


            The place where I headed
            I was told was a bit risky
            But I knew it wasn't a problem
            For I trusted the Dana60ís!


            Besides, I had the 231 4.1
            Which I could simply engage
            not to mention the added protection
            of the internal roll cage!


            The rain that had fallen
            Previously that day
            Had made conditions nasty
            But I said,"What the hey"!


            But what do I find
            As I entered the trail head?
            It was a guy in a Ford truck...
            ...his engine was dead.


            He asked if I'd winch him
            Back off of the trail
            I felt sorry for the guy
            So I said what the Hell!


            I free spooled the winch
            And chunked him the line
            I chuckled as I told him,
            "You're wastin' precious wheelin' time"!


            I hit the "IN" switch
            And the winch sucked him out
            Back up to a safe spot
            The guy looked like he was gonna pout!


            I told him not to worry
            As we unhooked the line
            It was a very common problem...
            ...with a lot of the Ford kind!


            He checked out my rig
            And was rather impressed!
            He asked where all I've wheeled
            So I went down the list.....


            Well, there's been John Bull...
            and Holcomb...and good ole Gorman...
            There was Dishpan and Moab...
            ...not to mention the Rubicon!


            He called for a tow truck
            To take him back to his hole
            And then I jumped in my Cherokee
            As I was ready to roll!


            I engaged the 231 4.1
            Down into compound low
            He said as I crawled by him
            DAMNÖthatís a SLO MO FO!


            But, I hollered out my window
            As I crawled outa sight...
            "NEXT TIME GET A JEEP
            AND YOU'LL BE ALRIGHT"!!!
            Over 2500 hours donated to the San Bernardino National Forest. Life member of CA4WD, CORVA & BRC. Tread Lightly Trainer. Reforestation Supervisor. CASSP

            Comment


            • #7
              *claps* Dude, I wanna yell a mighty approval to that...but I think it's unappropriate...so Poet, I PM'ed you.
              WTF Mate?

              Confucious Say: He who stand on toilet...is high on pot.

              ______
              [_____]
              (HllllllllH) vroom VROOM
              []--o---[]

              Comment


              • #8
                Why would you hang out on a Jeep fourm when you dont have a Jeep and then talk crap? and post the same dumb story twice? try this fourm...
                www.MyFordSUCKS.com
                |90 XJ|4.0|AX-15|NP231|RE H&T|TnT Y-Link|RE Coils|BOR Leaves|ACOS|D30/Aussie|8.8/ARB|35" Kevlar MTRs|Custom Exo,Sliders,Bumpers|

                !!! outdoorlogic.net !!!

                Comment


                • #9
                  that was good stuff FISHPOET :haha:

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Good Job Doug!!!! You have talent!!

                    I guess the lesson we are learning here......is that if you need help from a guy with a Ford, he is going to charge you. If a guy with a jeep comes to help.....well, your in good hands and he probably won't charge you for it.

                    Merry Christmas to all,
                    Bob
                    "If you have significant difficulty here, dont go any further....it only gets worse".
                    (Charles Wells)

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Guys with Fords are JERKS!

                      Wait, I've got a Ford too...

                      I'm confussed... where's my medicine.


                      (Good stuff FP!)


                      Ride'on,

                      ~CRASH!~

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        yeah ive got a ford also coulple of them //but i love my jeep more.





                        Originally posted by CRASH! View Post
                        Guys with Fords are JERKS!

                        Wait, I've got a Ford too...

                        I'm confussed... where's my medicine.


                        (Good stuff FP!)


                        Ride'on,

                        ~CRASH!~

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          I love my f-150 baddest a$$ two wheel drive around. But my Jeep takes me places that a ford would never go. I like both and both have there place.

                          P.S. pulled out my friends f-350 with my tj if I can find the Video I will post it for you.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            I like that poem but I put wrangler in there instead of Cherokee, sounds better than Rubicon. just put in there what you want! Jeep, Ford, Chevy, moped, go for it, lol
                            Jeeps Rock & Quads Too!

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by rockrat33 View Post
                              P.S. pulled out my friends f-350 with my tj if I can find the Video I will post it for you.
                              I'd LOVE to see that!!!
                              If we aren't supposed to eat animals, then why are they made out of meat?

                              http://jeep.matandtiff.com/

                              Truth is treason in the empire of lies. -Ron Paul

                              Comment

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