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Duck report


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  • Duck report

    A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary
    surgeon. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet
    pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the
    bird's chest. After a moment or two, the vet shook
    his head sadly and said, "I'm so sorry, your pet
    has passed away."

    The distressed owner wailed, "Are you sure?"

    "Yes, I'm sure. The duck is dead," he replied.

    "How can you be so sure", she protested. "I mean,
    you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He
    might just be in a coma or something."

    The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the
    room. He returned a few moments later with a black
    Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the
    dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination
    table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then looked at the
    vet with sad eyes and shook his head. The vet patted the
    dog and took it out and returned a few moments later
    with a beautiful cat.

    The cat jumped up on the table and also sniffed the
    bird from its beak to its tail and back again. The
    cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed
    softly, jumped down and strolled out of the room.

    The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry,
    but as I said, this is most definitely, 100%
    certifiably, a dead duck."

    Then the vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a
    few keys, and produced a bill, which he handed to
    the woman.

    The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill.
    "$150!" she cried. "$150 just to tell me my duck is

    The vet shrugged. "I'm sorry. If you'd taken my word
    for it, the bill would have been $20. But with the
    Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it all adds up."
    You're just upset because the voices in my head only talk to ME!

  • #2
    LMAO! Good stuff

    [sign]nlm mln[/sign]


    • #3
      very nice!!
      B R E T T
      87 XJ 3" lift, 31s-thats all thats worth mentioning


      • #4
        that joke rocks
        censored for having an opinion