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It's a Real Jeep if ...


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  • It's a Real Jeep if ...

    You Know You Have A Real Jeep If . . .

    1. You use a hose to clean the inside and the outside
    2. You determine that the best route from Point A to Point B is through a rock pile or over a mountain
    3. You call a scratch or a dent, a beauty mark
    4. You roll it over and don't get upset
    5. Your mom or your sister can't get in without help
    6. You judge every hill you see by how much fun it would be to climb
    7. You puke when you see a RAV-4
    8. You get custom pin-striping from trail brush
    9. A low-rider Jeep pulls up next to you, and you get out and bitch-slap the driver
    10. It takes more than 6 hours to get donuts
    11. You pull into the unplowed parking spots on snowy days
    12. You take your friends wheeling and they say "What trail; I don't see a trail!"
    13. You've been forced to add TJ, CJ, YJ, and XJ to your spell-checker
    14. You can see OVER a Suburban
    15. You carry emergency supplies and clothing because you never know where you will end up
    16. Your Nerf bars battle rocks and win
    17. It rains and you don't care that your tops and doors are off
    18. You drive around to look at Christmas lights topless
    19. You change your plugs in the parking lot at work on a break
    20. Your "Parts Department" is on blocks behind your house
    21. You take your Mom wheeling and she has to help you flip the Jeep back onto its wheels again
    22. You use an ice-scraper on the inside of the windshield
    23. You get more heat from holes in the floorboards than through the heater vents
    24. Every page of your repair manual has greasy fingerprints
    25. Passengers scream "DON'T ROLL IT!" when you take them wheeling
    26. You spend more time under your Jeep than under your significant other
    27. Winter comes and your can't remember where you left your top
    28. You spend more on car washes than on insurance
    29. Even worse, the car wash won't let you in
    30. You fix almost everything yourself
    31. You feel sorry for someone in a $60,000 Toyota Land Cruiser
    32. You have all your credit card numbers memorized
    33. You slam the door and chunks of dried mud crumble to the ground
    34. You get asked to pick up your co-workers in a snowstorm and get paid for it
    35. Your wife/girlfriend refuses to get in it
    36. You are the only one on the street who doesn't plow their driveway
    37. You are dating the Service, Parts, or Sales Manager at your local Jeep dealership
    38. You try to run the plow trucks off the road when it snows heavily
    39. You can't hear your $200 stereo over the howl of your tires on the highway
    40. You have a high-water mark INSIDE the Jeep
    41. You think that any tire that isn't waist high looks like a bagel
    42. You can't take a girl, who's wearing a dress, on a date without carrying along a set of steps
    43. You can't sneak into church late because the engine is too loud
    44. You carry along enough tools to supply a small garage
    45. You nickname your Jeep after the noises it makes or it's most damaging trail accident
    46. You carry along a replacement part for every drive component on the Jeep
    47. You can air up your tires without stopping at a gas station
    48. You know how to reinforce the windshield frame near the wiper arm
    49. You're constantly getting passed on the highway
    50. The Service Department has to let all of the air out of your front tires in order to reach the engine
    51. Your wallet is always empty!
    1953 M38A1
    A mix of original military history and dune running/rock crawling customization

  • #2
    12. You take your friends wheeling and they say "What trail; I don't see a trail!"
    “Lead me, follow me, or get out of my way. ”
    -Gen. George S. Patton Jr.